All in doing life together

BACK TO THE FUTURE: Marriage Advice

I am feeling very nostalgic, probably because it is the season.  It is the time of the year that we look back and give thanks for all that God has done in our lives.  And this is exactly what I have found myself doing.  I've been looking at old pictures of Jody and I, our life together, our three beautiful children, and past holidays spent with family and friends.  My conclusion is that God has richly blessed my family!  I know this from my 2017 vantage point, but I didn't always know this to be true.  I wish there was a way I could go back and encourage my younger self in the faith!  

Communication is the Key!

I'm good at my job.  So by all accounts, I am a communication specialist.  So I'm sure it came as a big surprise to my sweet husband that when we first married, I was really bad at communicating with him.  Considering this early time in our marriage, you could compare Jody’s situation with someone who had just married a graduate from the Culinary Institute of America only to find out their new spouse couldn’t cook at home – their spouse could make delicious meals for strangers, but could hardly boil water in their own kitchen.  You would want your money back, right?!

Repent and Forgive

We must lay aside our pride, acknowledge our hurt and let our spouse know when our feelings have been injured.  I can’t stress how important the act of humbling yourself is to the health of your marriage!  This will take a soul-bearing conversation where you may have to admit to your spouse that you are not as secure as you’d like to think you are or that you portray.  It will require you to be vulnerable. 

Love and Respect

God knew that inside each man and woman there would live a struggle.  This struggle would revolve around issues inside a man’s heart and in a women’s mind.  God knew men would have little difficulty loving themselves and that women would desire to rule over their husband.  I do not for a minute believe that either struggle was shocking to God.  He created Adam and Eve and fellowshipped with them as they lived in the Garden of Eden.

Got My Bags Packed!

Now, I love a spontaneous adventure as much as the next girl, but I don't want the entirety of my life to be such.  Jody and I do and have discussed the plans for almost everything.  Early on, we discussed what concepts did we wanted our children to embrace during their childhood and what holiday traditions did we want to incorporate into our family in order to bring a sense of family unity and a dependence on God.  Later, we discussed what joint physical fitness goals we wanted and what financial security goals we believed we needed, and we discussed how each would contribute to meet this accomplishment.