Friends With Benefits!
Friends with Benefits
My youngest grandson loves Super Heroes. He is almost four, so he hasn’t really seen any of the Marvel Comic movies. But, he somehow knows the names of almost all the Supers. And, he knows what their super powers are. Well, sort of. I am slowly collecting the Supers so that he and I can play when he comes over to my house. We started with Ironman, Captain America and the Hulk. Why those three? I do not know. It took me weeks to convince him that the Hulk was a “good guy.” My grandson didn’t like his angry expression, but finally Hulk’s big muscles won him over. When we play, he is always quick to remind me what each hero’s powers are. For example, the Hulk cannot fly through the air … only Ironman can fly because he has “rocker boosters on his boots.” When we get ready to play, we both chose which Super we want to be. Then we play for hours saving the world from crashing planes, giants, dragons (my Labrador, Lucy), scary robots, and volcanoes. After the first three, I quickly added other Supers; thanks to Amazon’s two-day shipping. My grandson and I now have a whole slew of heroes at our beckon call!
Sidebar: Why are there so few female super heroes? Most of the female characters appear to be villains. Hmmm? I’ll save that discussion for another day. 😊
After many hours of pretending, and over the course of several play dates, and in a state of exhaustion, I got a brilliant idea! I posed the following question to my grandson, “Which super has the best napping power?” He pondered it for a minute, then thoughtfully replied, “Spiderman, because he is still just a boy.” Tada! I am a genius!
Now when we play, I fight to be Spiderman. As Spiderman, I use my “napping power” whenever my knees start to give out or when I need to progress the laundry or answer the phone. At my house, the benefit of being Spiderman is that you get to be in the game, but you always have an “out card” whenever you need it. I love Spiderman! And by the way, I love playing with my youngest grandson too! He is pretty amazing and so very creative! He often tries to convert the bad guys – we have prayed the sinner’s prayer with the Joker more times than I can count. 😊
In real life, I am always looking for the benefits of different activities. An example. I love shopping at Publix. I love the clean store, bright smiling employees and the beautiful produce section. I also love not having to bag my own groceries or carry them to my car. This is a benefit of shopping at such a nice store. I also love using the dry cleaners in my neighborhood. I love the kind, hard-working owners. They do great work, have a convenient drive thru window and always know my name when I drive up. This is a benefit of using your neighborhood dry cleaners. I also love attending my church! I love the great worship music, excellent preaching, expansive coffee bar, top notch children’s ministry, cool décor, and the sense of belonging that I feel when I walk through the front doors. These are the benefits to attending my church.
But for the purpose of today’s post, I’d love to explore the benefits of being married to my best friend. I simply love being Jody’s wife! He knows me and yet truly loves me (Proverbs 17:17). We have similar passions. He laughs at my jokes. We share the same history. And, I can tell him anything because I know he will understand. His is the first face I want to see when I open my eyes each morning. He holds me accountable and will not allow me to dwell in self-loathing. He is quick to encourage me in the Word (Ephesians 5:25-27) and remind me that I am created in the image of God (Genesis 1:26-27), sister of Christ and joint heir (Romans 8:17) for eternity! These are some of the many benefits of being married to my husband! Take a moment and compose your own list. What are the benefits of being married to your spouse? Tape the list to the mirror and thank God daily for these attributes.
Cultivating a friendship takes work, but it comes with great benefits. I pray you are spending time together with your spouse talking about your friendship. Honestly critique the present state of your friendship. Then start creating a plan to improve it. Do you have mutual activities you enjoy? (https://wordwashedwife.com/blog/2018/7/9/the-importance-of-recreational-companionship-in-your-marriage ) Are you meeting each other’s needs for intimate conversation?(https://wordwashedwife.com/blog/2018/7/13/the-importance-of-deep-conversations-in-your-marriage) Are you spending enough time cultivating the deep bonds needed to sustain your friendship and give it the power to accomplish God’s goal of sanctification? Are you spending time in the word or in prayer together? This is a great starting place. I know it is a bit cliché, but Rome wasn’t built in a day! Friends, take each other by the hand and walk out the covenant you made in front of God at your wedding altar. I believe in you!
As I searched scripture for this post, I found many verses that apply to the friend you have in your marriage mate. Hopefully the list will confirm a need to spend time developing your relationship with your spouse. Be encouraged and keep reading!
Colossians 3:12-14 – Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
Proverbs 17:17 – A friend loves at all times, but a brother is born for adversity.
Psalms 133:1 – How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!
Galatians 6:2 – Carry each other’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Proverbs 27:9 – Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice.
Job 2:11 – When Job’s three friends….heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 – Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
Song of Solomon 5:16 – His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, this is my friend.
Philippians 2:3-4 – Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, rather in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interest but each of you to the interests of others.
Proverbs 27:5-6 – Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
John 15:13 – Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for a friend.
Proverbs 17:17 – As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
Matthew 18:20 – For where two are gathered in my name, there am I with them.
Job 16:20-21 My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; on behalf of a man he pleads with God as one pleads for a friend.
Romans 12:16 – Live in harmony with one another.
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these (Mark 12:30-31).”